Chasing Jenna Read online

  “I hope you’re Katie.” The words came out as a forced whisper because she held me so tightly. We had talked on the phone a couple times since finding out we were roommates, so I wasn’t completely shocked that this was her introduction. She was funny and loud, liked to talk and loved to shop. She was also sure that we would be lifelong best friends.

  I dropped my bags when she released me and tried to fill my lungs with needed oxygen. Cale stood in the doorway but had placed my bags next to one of the wardrobes.

  “Katie, this is Cale Davis.”

  He extended his hand and politely shook hers. “Nice to meet you, Katie.”

  “Nice, to meet you too,” she replied, looking back and forth between Cale and me.

  “Jenna, if you’re comfortable with the idea, I could take your keys and get the last of your bags out of your car while you two get aquatinted.” I reached into my pocket and handed him the keys.

  “I’ll be right back,” he said as he ducked into the hallway.

  I turned back to face my new roommate, but she stood staring at the spot where Cale had been.

  “Is that your boyfriend?” she asked, pointing to the empty doorway.

  “Are you kidding me? I should be so lucky! I just met him. He’s from some house on campus that does volunteer work. They help people move in. I think he called it, The Brotherhood …” She gasped and lunged at me, gripping both of my shoulders.

  “You mean there are more of them?” She started a wild dance in the middle of our room and sang a song, something about “I love college”. In that second I knew she was right, we were going to be best friends.

  “Come over here!” She half skipped across the room and then pointed outside. There was only one window in the room but it was huge. It looked out onto a courtyard that separated the girls’ tower from the boys’. I looked down onto a flurry of activity as people ran around setting up stands and stringing lights. “What’s going on down there?”

  “The Information Fair is tomorrow night,” Katie said, she did a jump and clapped. I grabbed her hands and held them tightly in front of her. Her big, silly grin made it impossible to be serious.

  “You were a cheerleader, weren’t you?” She nodded her head enthusiastically.

  “Great,” I mumbled. “Mornings should be fun around here.”

  Katie winked at me.

  “Okay, what is the Information Fair?” I asked, releasing her hands and looking back out the window.

  “It’s when all the sororities, fraternities and clubs have their booths out to recruit for the new school year. There’s food and music and my friend said it’s a great place to meet guys. Hot guys! Want to go?”

  “Sure, sounds fun.” I stood side by side with my new friend. We looked out our window, discussing what groups we wanted to talk to. It was easy and comfortable. I exhaled a relaxing breath. Something inside of me settled.

  Katie pointed to the fire escape directly outside our window. “The RA stopped by earlier and said that we’re a designated fire room. That’s why our room is a little bigger, so if the dorm starts burning down, everyone will come to our room to get out. I think it’ll be great for sneaking out after dorm curfew.” She wiggled her eyebrows up and down at me.

  I choked on a nervous laugh, looked down to the ground and then back at her. She was serious, well, as serious as I guessed she could be.

  “Since I’m terrified of heights, I’ll leave the sneaking out to you.” We leaned against the window sill, surveying the room. Our beds were built on stilts and only a couple feet from the ceiling, Katie’s was to the left, mine to the right. A couch and a small fridge she brought with her sat under her bed and two dressers and a stand for the TV stood under mine. At the end of each bed was a small desk and wardrobe. Home sweet home.

  We began the daunting task of unpacking and discussed how we wanted the room set up. The idea of having a close friend seemed so foreign to me. I didn’t really know how to act. I’d spent all my time taking care of my mom and working. It hadn’t left a lot of free time to hang out.

  “Hey Jenna, here’s the rest of your things.” A familiar face walked into the room with arms full of my things. I took the bags hanging off his arms, dropping them by the end of my bed.

  “Thank you so much. You’ve been a huge help.” Turning back toward Cale, I realized he wasn’t alone. Someone stood behind him. This guy was olive skinned with dark hair which made his vivid blue eyes stand out.

  ‘I’m sorry,” Cale said quickly, noticing me smiling in the other boy’s direction. “This is Marcus, a first year brother in the house. Marcus, this is Jenna and Katie.”

  I glanced at Katie, hoping she wasn’t doing her 'I love college' dance again. She was quiet … and still. Strange.

  “Hello,” he said in Katie’s direction. I wasn’t sure he knew I was in the room, and suddenly, Katie was shy.

  “Hi.” I moved to my friend’s side giving her some moral support. Marcus, unable to avoid my presence in the room then, looked at me and smiled.

  “It is nice to meet you both.” His stare immediately returned to Katie. Her eyes bounced between the floor and Marcus.

  Cale put my bags with the rest of my belongings and took my small TV from Marcus.

  His large biceps peeked out from under his sleeve when he sat it on the stand. I looked away, not wanting this guy to think I was a creeper when he’d been so nice to me.

  Katie and Marcus weren’t talking, but had also not taken their eyes off of each other. I shoved my hands into my pockets, rocked back and forth a little, trying to look anywhere but the two of them. I felt uneasy, like I was watching something that was intimate, and I shouldn’t be involved in.

  I caught myself biting my bottom lip, a stupid habit when I was nervous. My mom always told me it made my emotions too readable.

  “I hope you don’t mind that Marcus helped with the rest of your things.”

  “No, not at all.”

  I was relieved Cale had broken the silence and snapped the tension in the room a bit. I smiled when I looked his way, praying he would forget all my awkwardness. His eyes locked onto mine and the side of his mouth rose into a smirk. I nearly died.

  “Do you ladies need any more help?” he asked.

  “No, but thanks again. It was really nice of you.”

  He held my car keys out to me. I reached for them and was surprised when he grabbed my hand with both of his.

  “You’re welcome Jenna. It was nice to meet you and I hope to see you around campus.” He turned to leave but before walking out the door, he glanced back at me over his shoulder, “Try not to attack anyone tonight, okay?”

  I shifted my weight to one side and crossed my arms in front of my chest. “Very funny.”

  He laughed, tapped Marcus on the shoulder and walked out the door. Marcus looked embarrassed as he turned to follow.

  We stood in silence, staring at our closed door for several seconds until we both started giggling. We grabbed each other’s hands and danced the 'I love college' dance together.

  >CHAPTER THREE<

  I yawned and fell onto the couch with a loud sigh, pulling my aching feet up underneath me. Exhaustion from the drive here and crazy amount of unpacking Katie and I accomplished in the last few hours hit hard. “I can’t do anymore,” I said dramatically and threw my arm over my face.

  Katie flopped down next to me, laying her head onto the back of the couch. She took a deep breath in, exhaling slowly. The moment of silence granted me the window I had been waiting for. I needed to get the short version of my life out before she asked about it. Ripping off a band-aid quickly was always the better option as opposed to inch by painful inch.

  “It’s just me and my mom,” I said. Hesitant to look at her, I adjusted so I could stare straight ahead. She’d spent the last hour talking about her big family. Her life sounded like a fairytale with Katie the star of every story. She was an only child, like me, but that is where the similarities ended. She was loved, car
ed for and protected. She had childhood memories … happy ones. Her favorites being the holiday celebrations thrown in her parent’s backyard. Cousins, grandparents and neighbors all came to spend time together.

  Holidays meant better tips for me. No special memories, no pretty family pictures.

  I kept my eyes forward, no turning back now. “My mom was an only child, her parents died before I was born. No cousins, no aunts or uncles. Only us.” I felt the heaviness of her stare, but didn’t turn her way. Seeing the same pity in her eyes that I’d been getting for years would be too difficult right now.

  “I’m sorry …” she whispered.

  I held up my hand, interrupting her. I didn’t need the old ‘feel sorry for the poor girl with no family’ routine. I sat a little straighter as I spoke this time. My tone a bit more terse than I wanted it to be, but I couldn’t help it.

  “Don’t feel sorry for me.” I felt my face warming as emotions I tried so hard to keep buried fought to be revealed. “My father left my mom when he found out she was pregnant. Judging from the string of losers she’s brought around since, it was probably a blessing in disguise. It’s always been just me and her. It’s been fine.”

  She put her hand softly on my leg. My eyes darted down to where she touched me, and back to her face.

  Her dark eyes blinked against tears that threatened to spill over. “Oh Jenna, I didn’t mean that I feel sorry for you, I meant I’m sorry that I’m such a bitch. I blabbed on about my life without letting you get a word in.” I nodded slightly, acknowledging her apology. “She is all you know, it must have been so hard to leave her.”

  A small tear surprised me and escaped down my cheek. I brushed it away, trying to turn away from her but she wouldn’t allow it. She gathered me into her arms and hugged me ridiculously tight.

  “I’ll be your sister.” And just like that, she claimed me as her own. No one had ever made an effort to be part of my life. My body involuntarily stiffened and I clumsily patted her back. I didn’t know how to care about someone in this way … with a level of concern about their well-being. It certainly didn’t come naturally to me, but I couldn’t deny I liked the way it sounded in theory. Still, the thought of sharing my messed up world with her was inconceivable.

  When it became clear she wasn’t letting go, I relaxed into her arms slightly and into my first real hug.

  She whispered, “You can tell me everything or nothing. It doesn’t matter to me. But I promise to never leave you.”

  Hope sprung inside of me; maybe good people really did exist. I knew I couldn’t believe her completely, although part of me wanted to. I clenched my lips together, trying to keep the sobs at bay while tears slid down my cheeks.

  Although her words had given me hope, they had cemented something else in my mind as well. She would never be privy to the darkness I endured … I would make sure of it. Her fairytale would stay intact.

  ~~~

  Katie popped her head up over the side of my bed at eight o’clock. “Good morning, Sunshine. Time to get up!”

  “Are you kidding me?” I growled, pushing her head back down. “This might be the first Saturday in my entire life I don’t have anything to do and you want me to get up early?”

  “That’s right. We have things to get done today. Get that tiny ass out of bed so we can go exploring!”

  I rubbed my eyes, propping myself up on my elbows. “We need rules about sleep time. The rule is, I need more sleep than you.” I fell back onto the mattress, using the pillow to drown out the sunlight and the sound of my roommate’s chipper voice. When that didn’t work, I rolled onto my stomach and pulled the pillow tighter over my head.

  “We can’t look like newbies, Jenna. Don’t you want to know where things are?”

  “I thought you said you cased the whole campus while you were waiting for me.” I stuck one hand out and twirled it in a dramatic circle around my head while I talked. “And isn’t that what maps are for?” I yelled into my mattress and tucked my arm back under my pillow, securing my decision to stay in bed.

  A sharp sting bit into my right butt cheek. I jolted to a sitting position. Katie ran out of the room laughing but stopped in the doorway, grimacing and shaking the hand she had slapped me with.

  Good, it hurt her too.

  “Did you seriously just …”

  She interrupted in a singing voice, “See you in the shower, beautiful!”

  She danced her way out of our room but left the door wide open. I fell back onto my mattress, stared at the ceiling and said, out loud, to no one, “Oh my God, I live with sing-along, cheerleading Barbie.”

  ~~~

  Katie wiggled her way toward the front of the mail desk line. I stayed at the back of the line, where we had waited entirely too long for her liking. She gave a little wave to one of the male workers and held up two fingers. He reached over the people who were lined up in front of her and handed her two maps. She gave him a sweet smile, turning back to me.

  “Impressive,” I teased. “Do you even know that guy?”

  “Yes, that’s Carter. He lives in the boys’ tower, he’s a sophomore. He likes Mocha lattes.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “I hung out at The College Cafe yesterday. He works there.” She laced her arm with mine, turning us toward the doors.

  “I don’t know where that is,” I admitted.

  “It’s the coffee shop in the Student Union.” She smiled at me thinking she’d proven her point.

  “See, this is exactly why we need to be exploring today.” I guess she had.

  The Student Union was as big as the rest of the buildings, but looked more modern. Black lampposts lined the walk leading to the front doors. A sign with solid black lettering read, ‘The Student Union’, and was lit by spotlights. Even in the day, this building appeared to be a big deal. Judging from the amount of people outside in the sitting area, it was the place to be.

  Katie and I wound our way through the crowd to the doors. This is what I pictured college life to be. The excitement began to bubble up inside of me. I had no idea what to expect when I walked into the Student Union. If it was anything like what I had already experienced from college, it would be awesome – and I hadn’t even started classes yet.

  According to my daydreams, this would be the place where the extremely hot guys hung out. One of them waited inside to sweep me off my feet with a heated glance or an undeniable attraction. The S.U. was where the good stuff went down – I was sure of it!

  Katie gave me a quick wink over her shoulder as she pulled open the door. I followed her, expecting the true college experience to start as soon as we got inside.

  A sarcastic sound escaped my lips and echoed around the cavernous space. The few people, who sat at the round tables scattered all over, looked in our direction. I giggled into my hand. This place was a glorified mall food court. The only thing missing was an escalator. I bit my bottom lip as I looked around the empty area. I wouldn’t be having any mind-blowing, romantic encounters here today.

  The walls were lined with several types of shops, making it look even more 'mall-ish': The College Book Store, The College Café and The College Outlet store, even a few fast food restaurants. The second floor held study rooms, a computer lab, and faculty offices. Boring … and more boring.

  A help wanted sign hanging in the window of The College Café caught my eye.

  “I’m going to run in and get an application.”

  Katie smiled and motioned toward one of the many open tables. “I’ll be over there.”

  “Meet you there in a bit,” I said as I walked into the Café. This might be the only place people came to study. Most of the high-top tables were full.

  “I’ll have a Vanilla Latte please, and an application.”

  The guy taking orders gave me a second look, reached under the counter and handed me the two-sided piece of paper. “The manager is usually here in the mornings during the week, if you bring it back then, he will intervie
w you on the spot.”

  “Thanks,” I glanced at his name tag, “Bryan.”

  While I waited for my latte, I watched people come and go from Katie’s table. Some, introducing themselves for the first time, others seemed to know her and stopped to chat.

  Katie was the perfect roommate for me – at least the part of me that didn’t want to be invisible. She sucked for the other part. People radiated to her. She said it was because she was tall, people could see her in a crowd, but I knew her personality drew them in. Her laugh was infectious and the way she tossed her long dark hair from shoulder to shoulder made her endearing. She was the girl every girl wanted to be friends with and every boy wanted to date. And her roommate wanted to be the invisible girl most of the time … how ironic was that.

  Katie spotted me staring and motioned for me to join her.

  “This is my roommate Jenna,” she said, pulling me out of her shadow, thrusting me into the spotlight, as I walked up to the table.

  “Isn’t she gorgeous?” Oh my God, did she just say that?

  I slid into a chair next to her.

  “This is Chelsea, Marie and Dana. They are from Alpha Delta Sigma, one of the sororities I talked with when I registered for my classes.”

  The three girls smiled their hellos at me, I gave a small wave. Their attention returned to Katie quickly. Dana flipped her brown hair over one shoulder and handed Katie a piece of paper. It was obvious they were over me. Dana looked like one of the beautiful people from yesterday. Chelsea and Marie were the perfect blonde book ends to compliment her.

  “Call me. We would like to meet with you. I think you would be a perfect fit for the Delts.”

  “Thanks, Dana. Jenna and I will look for your table at the Information Fair tonight.”

  Katie flashed her award-winning smile. Dana glanced at me; I sat motionless with a mouthful of latte, afraid of what she might do if I moved. She was beautiful but damn if she didn’t have a seriously scary edge to her also. I’m sure she wouldn’t think twice about lashing out at me with her perfectly manicured nails.

  “We look forward to it.” She smiled at Katie then turned on a dime with Ding and Dong right on her heels. I swallowed my latte, stood and looked at Katie, my eyes bulging out of my head.